...when admission on Christmas and New Years Eves is by ticket only, for the customer's 'elf and safety' of course, and most of your beer is spilled down your (or someone else's) front in the rugby scrum at the bar....
...by the look of their most recent pre-Christmas posts, the wise pub men know what they're talking about...
What better antidote to this could there be, than to take a short walk down the garden path from the hermitage to the pub shed local, The Poet & Hack...
 |
| ...one day all micro-pubs will look like this... |
The traditional bench seats are provided for the comfort of the locals, with essential cushion accessories...
 |
| ...proper bench seat with cushion |
 |
| Sheffield's finest... |
...the old mantel clock ticks quietly until it's gongs split the silence on the half hour and hour...
 |
| ...silence...about to be split.... |
...the quiet fizz as the vintage cast bottle opener is applied to the cap of Furze Dale Brewery's Christmas Ale...with its warming spices and 8% of alcohol by volume, which gives the locals a healthy glow and steams the windows of the snug...
|
 |
| ...pub shed essential reading... |
...the Christmas shelf decorations give a tasteful nod to the season and the old Christmas traditions...
 |
| ...just an average York street scene at Christmas... |
...as the toy seller tells the father what a fine present the wooden steam engine will make for his son...
 |
| ...it'll do Edinburgh to London in 4 hours, Guv... |
...and the chestnut seller hands his bag of steaming hot nuts to the young boy....
 |
| ...before Piper's crisps were invented... |
 |
| Si (in Hull City scarf) rushes home with his Christmas present of green highlighters.... |
...and the lights flicker in the little 'putz house' church and the sound of carols waft out over the cold night air...
 |
| putz church... |
...some fine examples of the 'Spirit of Life' tempt the locals to have a nightcap (or two), before setting off home...
 |
| not an optical illusion... |
...and the 35 year old bottle of Yugoslavian Sljivovica, still waits patiently for the opportunity to sear the throat of the unwary/reckless...
 |
| ...throat stripper... |
...and no snug bar would be 'albright' without it's red triangle...
 |
| ...red triangle...all bright ain't it.... |
...and the Poet & Hack spares no effort to bring you the finest bar snacks (though the local squirrel population may have a hard winter this year)...
 |
| ...squirrel's emergency rations... |
...Sir John's 1954 poem of Christmas with 'gels in slacks' and 'oafish louts', and the true meaning of Christmas, springs to mind as he looks down from his photo collage approvingly, on this little piece of eccentric old England...
 |
| Sir John...'poet and hack'... |
...the last drop of Christmas Ale is drained...
 |
...and all is well with the world...
Merry Christmas from The Poet & Hack
Save me some of that Yugoslavian stuff for my trip to the Isle of Wight !
ReplyDeleteHappy Christmas !
Ha ha ! Definitely. The kind of robust drink that is essential for any voyage of discovery to the lost island.
DeleteHappy Christmas Martin !
'Tis the season indeed. And in the spirit of things I shall refrain from making any double entendres (i.e. steaming hot nuts) or point out any grammatical errors (hint: those darn apostrophes!).
ReplyDeleteI won't even do my usual cut and paste... but I will partake of a few bullet points:
- a winter ale (of at least 8%) is de rigueur. I have a 330ml bottle of Delirium Christmas (10%) waiting patiently in my fridge
- whilst the reading material covers an adequate range, I do believe one book on beer should be in there somewhere
- the note (and accompanying figurine) on Si with his Hull city scarf and green highlighters was classic! Well done! (LOL)
- with regards to the squirrel emergency rations I'd be inclined to have some outside as well. One of my wife's sisters was evacuated this summer due to forest fires. She returned home this past week; only to find one lone squirrel had managed to get in, couldn't get back out, and tore the house apart! ;)
Oh, and I would consider it an hour to pop by the Shed local if I ever find myself in the vicinity. :)
Merry Christmas!
Steaming hot nuts and apostrophes - what do you mean..? He says innocently... ;)
DeleteDon't forget to be sitting down when you partake of the Christmas Delirium juice...
You're right about the reading material - will look to get that one sorted...
Next year's Christmas shelf montage may be completely in the theme of pub ticking, starring all the famous characters....
Good grief - I've heard of Squirrel Nutkin but Rambo Squirrel is a new one on me, just putting a few outside now (at a safe distance...)
You'll be most welcome at the Poet & Hack - I don't think we;re on any coach or package tour itineraries yet - but just call in anytime you're passing by...
:)
Cheers Russ - Merry Christmas!